Tuesday, December 5, 2017

2nd Day of Christmas – Pre-baby support

So I know I said I’d focus a good deal of these posts on Ellie’s care team, but the folks in this post were both Ellie’s team and my team, before Ellie was here.  They took amazing care of me and supported our family through a very stressful pregnancy.  I actually wrote about most of these folks in our very first blog post.  Since that’s been over three and a half years, it’s not a terrible idea to shine some spotlight their way, again.

After three years of hearing out other families and listening to hundreds of diagnosis stories, I’m even more grateful for this team than I was before I had Ellie.  Our diagnoses were given gently and with compassion – not to mention a very real sense that the doctors acknowledged that this was our BABY… and we loved her dearly.  We were never encouraged to terminate our pregnancy – but I’ve only met one other family who had that same experience.  This makes my heart hurt.  Just last month, the Ohio House passed legislation to ban abortion because of a Down syndrome diagnosis.  This is incredible, really!  While it likely won’t change how a parent feels about an unborn child, this bill will likely change the language used by medical professionals when they deliver such a diagnosis.

The diagnosis of Down syndrome, in and of itself, was hard to swallow during pregnancy.  If I had known just how hard our road would be once she arrived, I don’t imagine that I would have enjoyed my pregnancy as much as I did.  However, this team I’m going to recognize moved mountains to give us the best care possible.  We had a ridiculous amount of appointments between 18 and 40 weeks in my pregnancy… but we’re thankful for those crazy weeks and the attentiveness of this team.

1)     Dr. Dev – OB – Sidney
I vividly remember getting the call from Sasha (a nurse in Dr. Dev’s office) asking us to come in to discuss our quad screening results.  He went on to inform us that the results came back flagged for Down syndrome (we had a 1 in 93 chance instead of the 1 in 277 chance they expected for my age) and that we could do a non-invasive blood draw on me to determine with 99.6% accuracy if our child did have Down syndrome.  After ten long days, we were brought back in to discuss again.  Brandon and I were a mess of emotions, but Dr. Dev came into the ultrasound room and said, “Do you want to know the sex of your baby?”  “Of course”.  “Well, you’re having a girl… and it does look like she has Down syndrome.  Let’s take a look at her.”  He went on to do an incredibly detailed ultrasound.  When we heard her tiny heart beating, we completely lost it.  From here, we’d be referred to the next on our list and continue through our pregnancy with appointments both with Dr. Dev and Perinatal Partners.  Dr. Dev would finally release us from his care when I was 37 weeks pregnant.  When I came back to his office (when Ellie was about six months old, he’d ask about her and marvel at her when I’d bring her in.

I’ve always been in awe of how he handled our diagnosis (especially compared to other stories I’ve heard).  A few months ago I saw him at Shelby Hills for their anniversary celebration for Shelby County Board of Developmental Disabilities.  It’s no surprise to me that he supports the board of DD.  It was also no surprise to me when I learned several years ago that he spent time at the Women’s Center in Sidney making sure that all women had access to great prenatal care.  He’s an amazing man – a sweet soul – and the guy who delivered both of our boys.  We love Dr. Dev!

2)    Maternal Fetal Medicine – Perinatal Partners – Vandalia & Dayton
As I said above, we were referred to Perinatal Partners after our 18 week ultrasound where Dr. Dev found a heart defect.  We made an appointment for a month out.  As we drove to Vandalia for that first appointment, I sank my head back into the headrest in the car as Brandon drove.  Tears burned down my cheeks and my heart thumped hard in my chest.  I knew we were going down there to investigate Ellie’s heart and I was terrified.  We met Rachel, a genetic counselor, and she gave us the phone number of Lisa, a fellow genetic counselor who had a daughter with Down syndrome.  [Little did we know we’d come to know Lisa later through the Miami Valley Down Syndrome Association and through Dayton Children’s]  After taking an extensive family history and asking a battery of questions, Rachel walked us down the hall to meet Lara, our ultrasound tech.  Lara would spend about 45 minutes checking out our Bug with an ultrasound and fetal echo.  Half of that time was spent checking out Ellie’s heart.  Lara burnt our entire ultrasound to a DVD for us to take and spent a little time letting us see Ellie’s face, too. 

Remember this cute face from a much earlier blog post?  She was cute then, too!
Shortly thereafter, Dr. Sonek came in to talk to us about our tests.  He said that there were several additional markers for Down syndrome, but we could only know for sure with an amniocentesis.  We declined.  He then told us that he was referring us to Dayton Children’s Cardiology (insert Dr. Luby from the last post) and said it looked like our daughter had an endocardial cushion defect – also called an AV Canal Defect.  I lost it in the car because I’d done my research on this defect and was now saddened and terrified with this turn of events.

We’d go on to have many more appointments at Perinatal Partners (also called MFMUG – Maternal Fetal Medicine, Ultrasound and Genetics… I think I have that acronym correct).  We’d meet Dr. McKenna (who would later be there when Ellie was delivered) and Dr. Glover (who would admit me for pre-eclampsia when Ellie was 4 days old). 

The last time we saw the staff at MFMUG, I was back for my six-week follow-up and I came in toting Ellie and her brand new NG tube.  The staff went crazy over her.  Again, another office and another fabulous experience!!

3)    Dr. Josh Steinke – Steinke Family Chiropractic – Wapak
We started to get chiropractic care with Dr. Josh the same month he opened his office (May 2012).  I was very pregnant with Kaleb at the time and had a good deal of pregnancy-related discomfort that he helped me through.  He adjusted Kaleb when he was four days old and has been there for us through the past five years of our roller coaster.  When I was pregnant with Ellie, I had regular care.  When diagnoses started rolling in, he was there to support us and pray for us.  When we brought our tiny peanut in for him to adjust, he held her close to his chest and kissed her little head.  He’s prayed over our family many times and cares for our whole family.  We really need to get in to his office more often, that’s for sure!  He’s the first person to call Ellie “delicate” and it’s the perfect description for her.  She may not always be a fan of adjustments… but Dr. Josh is gentle and accommodating for her.  He’s also great at reminding us of the things he’s keeping a keen eye on because of the common troubles associated with Down syndrome (like tiny ear canals that are very susceptible to blockage and draining issues). 

I knew I had a picture of her 1st adjustment somewhere.  :)

You can call me crazy, but I really do believe that Dr. Josh is a HUGE reason why we’ve not had issues with ear infections for any of our kids.  I also totally credit him with the difference in my labor and birth experiences with Kaleb and Ellie.  He’s a kind soul and even when I know he has so many clients, he greets each one with enthusiasm and dishes out plenty of time and attention.  Man… I really need to get the family back there… like, now!



So yeah – this is the team that cared for us during our pregnancy and gave us endless support through the unknown craziness of that time.  This prenatal care team wraps up the group I want to recognize and thank on our 2nd Day of Christmas post.  Thank you for reading along!  I know I tend to ramble on – sorry about that.

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